There are a million and one decisions and details that go into the planning of a wedding: the site and reception venue, the gown, the flowers, the favors… Not to mention the color scheme, who you are going to ask to be a part of your bridal party, and who you are going to upset if you DON’T ask a particular person!😳 Then throw in the cake, the best photographer, the best videographer… Where will you go on your honeymoon?? The list goes on and on…
Funny that, often, if a couple isn’t religious, or isn’t associated with any particular church, thinking about WHOM will perform your ceremony may fall through the cracks of all of the other details. While, traditionally, those associated with a particular church, or who have a fondness for a particular member of the clergy, many clergy members will not come away from a church sanctuary to perform a marriage ceremony. Very often couples choose a venue that can accommodate a ceremony as well as a reception. If a clergy member will not perform away from a church site, many couples choose to work with a JP, instead. As I have said to many, many people: “Not EVERYONE is involved with church… They want to get married, too…!
Figuring out who will be the best individual to officiate your wedding is one tough job, especially if you haven’t been to many weddings before or have no idea how a ceremony is supposed to work.
Whether you’re asking a friend to officiate your marriage ceremony or hiring an officiant or JP, there are few qualities that you should consider and be on the lookout for to ensure you have a stellar wedding ceremony to kick-off your day! Nothing could be worse than a dull and lifeless ceremony, or someone who drags the ceremony on and on with embarrassing stories of you both. And, just because a good friend may be eager to obtain online credentials as an officiant, though their heart might be in the right place, that is not quite enough.
Here are a few qualities to look for in a good officiant or JP:
STELLAR WRITING ABILITIES:
Your wedding officiant should be a writer or at least have experience writing quality content
The hardest part of officiating is writing the ceremony, so be sure that the person you choose has experience writing quality material or establish if you’ll be the ones writing your own ceremony. A really great ceremony can take 10-20 hours to write, not including the time needed to gather information about you two. Even though it may seem like the ceremony isn’t important, it will be very obvious if someone isn’t good with sentence structure or makes awkward grammatical errors. Grammar does matter, folks!
PUBLIC SPEAKING EXPERIENCE:
They should have public speaking experience. Public speaking is a common fear for many people, and the person officiating your wedding, no matter how big or small, needs to be comfortable speaking in front of an audience. Someone with public speaking experience will also know how to react in case something unplanned happens without tripping up on their words. Additionally, a great public speaker can engage an audience and have fun with you two all while legalizing your ceremony.
PROFESSIONAL PERSONALITY:
Your officiant/JP should have an awesome, yet professional personality! You’re going to tell this person your life story, intimate moments, and probably become good friends with that person if you aren’t already. If you’re hiring someone, you can easily judge their personality and writing style based on their introduction email to you. If you’re working with a loved one, be sure it’s someone you trust with this information and isn’t going to drunkenly officiate your ceremony.
PUNCTUAL:
They should be timely—there is nothing more embarrassing than getting ready to walk down the aisle and your officiant is missing. A professional officiant/JP should respond to emails within 48 business hours and arrive at your ceremony at least 30 minutes beforehand. A friend or family member should be the most punctual person you know that can round up your wedding party should they wander off before ceremony time.
If you would like to discuss this further, feel free to reach out to me!
HAPPY PLANNING!
JP, Bobi Gill-Brooks
